Never Censored

I’ve watched quite a few science fiction films, mainly because I’m a sci-fi nut. But now, with Invasion coming to prime time soon, I’m seriously starting to doubt the intelligence of aliens. After all, they screwed up in Invasion of the Body Snatchers, Tommy Knockers, Signs, tons of others, and most importantly Independence Day.

Something’s wrong here. I’m guessing these aliens get to our planet, discover alcohol, tobacco, weed, and hardcore drugs; then, it’s downhill from there. Some dumbass alien gets bored and fucks it up for their entire race. So, who do they need to fire in order to be successful in overtaking the damn Earthlings? Who knows, but I have observed a few nearly surefire ways of decimating Earth:

God's doing it!

Am I going to say it? Yes. I think it's on everyone's mind.

Has enough time passed? No. But, that hasn't stopped me in the past.

Is it going to piss people off? Yep. At least half of them.

So here it is:

I blame God. That's right. I said it. I blame God for the hurricanes.

Why, you ask? It's simple: God hates the red states.

God's tornadoes have proven nearly ineffective for dealing with the midwest (all red states, I might add), so he now believes that he must try something more to-the-point: hurricanes.

With Katrina destroying Louisiana (red state), harming Florida (red state), and roughing up Mississippi and Alabama (red states), the bigger and badder Rita is on its way to Texas (surprise: red state and oil company capital of the world). We must acknowledge the fact that God simply hates fag-hating, retard-executing, cousin-fucking, cow-tipping, money-spending, country-invading, religiously-smiting, corporate-embezzling, election-rigging, oil price-inflating red states. God simply desires, and acts in the most biblical way possible, to clense the red plague from Our Nation Under Him.

For too long God has stood idly by, watching, among other things, corporate greed engulf our nation and its children, the gay people created in His image be treated like shit, and the US invading countries and killing innocent people in His name. He had originally thought that all of this was a settled matter after the Crusades failed miserably. He was wrong.

But that's okay. Now is the time of reckoning. Take after the Northern states. They've never had to worry about acts of God, only acts by free-willed people acting in the name of Allah by ramming planes into buildings and setting off bombs.

Republicans, I beg you: cast away your sin and all shall be forgiven. You want so desperately to save lives-- do so! Shed your bigoted views and ignorant pretenses: you must!

Some people live a lifetime for a sign from God: this is it! Praise the Lord! Save the children! Praise the Lord! Repent! REPENT!!!

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Man, it sucks when religion is against you. Maybe the Baptists could learn something by seeing how it feels on the other side of the hate.

Obviously, I don't think the above is true. After all, I don't really believe in God. I wrote it to prove a point and to put things into perspective. People seem to attribute anything that falls in line to their viewpoints to God (or other deities) only when it suits them. When the equal-and-opposite reaction hits, it suddenly becomes chance happening-- a trial-and-tribulation scenario. A quarterback throws the winning touchdown and he thinks God did it. His skill, practice, and heredity had nothing to do with it, of course-- God did it. So, why doesn't he blame God when he fumbles?

I say if you're going to hold God responsible for any one thing, then he should be responsible for everything that exempts free will. I'm just looking for some consistency here.

If God elected Bush to the presidency, then God should be responsible for the killing of thousands of people in the red states through actual acts of God: hurricanes.

I say the red states need to become blue states. I'd laugh my ass off if the hurricanes then suddenly stopped and/or returned to their average sizes.

Cheers.

I just watched Pay It Forward. Interesting movie. Basically, the idea is that “Life Sucks” and that we should make it better for everyone else. One would think, “ah, easier said than done.” But really, how hard is it? And, does life really suck, or is it just our country? Consider for a second that America isn’t the best place in the world to live for most people.

Hmm, I think I lost most of the patriots in the room with that last sentence. But what’s ironic is that most patriots I’ve come across have fairly little world intelligence. That is, they claim our country is so great, but really don’t know any better. It’s like in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory when little Wonka had been convinced candy was rotten, evil stuff because it rots his teeth; and, he came to believe it because it was drilled into his head—until he tried it. Do your research, and you might open your eyes a little wider to the truth.

Think for a moment. The United States is a great place. We’ve got McDonald’s orgasmic French fries, Ben and Jerry’s delectable chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, and five hundred channels of pure couch potato pleasure just waiting to jump into our brains from our cable boxes. But what’s the trade off?

Undoubtedly, this is a great country for the above average capitalist. You’re able to make a product, start a business, and make lots of money. It’s capitalism. It’s great. Theoretically speaking, anyone can go from rags to riches if he really wanted to.

Problem: Not all people are capable of such a feat. I mean, it takes one of two things in order to live the American dream of becoming filthy rich: either you need to inherit lots of money from the beginning, or you need to start from close to nothing (capitalistically speaking).

Let’s face it, not all little Timmy’s and Suzy’s are suited for success. There are a lot of loser kids out there who, regardless of what their parents do, how they’re nurtured, or how good their interpersonal relationships are, are simply not going to do anything great. This is where countries differ on their understandings of this concept.

The United States views this person as actually being able to pull himself out of the gutter and into the throes of success no matter who they are. Can they? Maybe. Who knows. Most people are content if they can simply eat their McDonald’s, watch TV, sleep, rinse, wash, repeat. However, even being able to grab a middle-class job can be difficult for some people, especially if they start out in the red to begin with.

What I think happens is this: these loser kids who are present in any society still want the American dream—or at least something close to it. However, if they lack the means to hitch their wagon to the same star every other American does—the middle class job with a house, car, two ½ kids, and a dog—they will find other stars to follow. This is where America starts seriously sucking balls.

When people can’t live up to the ideals they think everyone else can, they do other things. With little imagination, you can assume what some of these activities are: drugs, theft, prostitution, rape, and more. Scarily enough, most of these are related to money in some way or another. Drugs are a huge black market with gigantic profits; theft is, by nature, a monetarily-related act, prostitution is sex for money (which I’m completely for—ugly people need lovin’ too); and, rape generally occurs because a woman doesn’t want to have sex with someone (probably because of social status, which is determined by money).

What’s worse is that healthcare isn’t free in this country. So, before people are even able to live healthily, they have to have insurance, and to get insurance, they have to have a job that gives them decent insurance, and even then they’ve generally got to copay. Therefore, even if someone has a job (minimum wage or so), a $5,000 dollar hospital visit is nearly impossible to pay; and, good luck getting a loan with bad credit or a minimum wage job.

The point is that in a country in which even middle class people have to worry about health insurance, poor people really have to worry about it. And, American dream aside, what is more of a priority to human beings than being healthy? Even before sex, being able to stand up, walk, and overall live in a state other than malaise requires healthcare. But you don’t get it in this country unless you’re rich.

This is part of the reason America sucks. Right above us, Canada gives healthcare away. Sure, you’ve got some extra taxes, but seriously, who gives a shit? Oh wait, the corporations that own this country. Anyway, as a result, Canada doesn’t have people mugging others on the street in order to pay for their daughter’s ER visit; and, they don’t have poverty. Homelessness? Really no such thing. Safety? Overwhelmingly less murders. Hatred? Same answer.

And it’s not just Canada. Look at Western Europe. Socialism everywhere, and look what happens: I’m able to cut and paste everything I just typed for Canada to describe their societies, too. And it’s not just because they’re homo-friendly, either. Despite what most would think, higher taxes and happier people doesn’t kill business—in a way, it helps it. Some of the most successful companies started in socialized European countries. Nokia’s one of the best examples of this. Granted, Nokia would probably make more money if it started and continued to run in the United States due to fewer taxes, but what’s more important? Success or happiness?

Honestly, if all it takes to have a safer, happier society, I think I’d rather pay more taxes. I’d rather pay half of my paycheck to the government if I was able to walk down the street at night and not think twice about my safety. I would pay more than half of my paycheck if I knew that people weren’t killing other people just to have some of the things we take for granted. Wouldn’t you?

People say life sucks. I agree—life in this country sucks. But it’s our own making. If you want things to change, then elect some good representatives. Stop believing that this is the best country on the planet because it isn’t yet. Look at others who are kicking our asses in social well-being. I’d trade my McDonald’s, Ben and Jerry’s, and 500 cable channels for true happiness, safety, and security for most of the people in our country any day.

Someone once said that money was the root of all evil—it’s funny how true it is.

/America isnt' the best.
//Amsterdam, Netherlands is.